The other day I was busy cleaning my house while my partner was lounging on the couch listening to Justin Timberlake at ear splitting levels. As I was swiffering around the house, a feeling of resentment and anger started to emerge. Why is he not helping me while I am laboring over the house?. Anyway, My music snobbishness reared it’s ugly head and I wound up snapping, criticizing him and the music he was listening to (Justin Timberlake!?!?!).
My partner calmly looked at me and said “why are you criticizing me about my music? I don’t criticize you for the music you listen to”. As I looked at him, a feeling of regret came over me and said “I know”
Sometimes in the heat of our anger we need to step back and realize that we all deserve love and respect even if the other person’s views or listening tastes are different. As a wise Buddhist teacher told me: “We don’t need other people to change, we just need to change our mind. If we stop seeing people with faults we can cherish them more.”