My partner was recently outed at work by one of his co-workers. He was upset but outwardly appeared calm. For years, I had been telling him that he needed to confide in someone to help break free of the mental chains that have imprisoned him.
He was living a life of loneliness and fear at work. Even though he was popular and well liked, he somehow managed to avoid talking about his personal life for the last 3 years!!
The next day after being outed, he decided to tell one of his uninformed friends and to his surprise discovered that his co-worker was also gay. Go figure.
In the end we had a small gathering at my house with most of his friends. They were supportive and a little upset that he had kept an important part of his life from them. No big deal. Very anti-climactic.
Last year, I was playing with his 8 year old daughter (who visits every summer) and I jokingly mentioned that her dad and I were married. I was half expecting her think I was crazy.
She froze and pensively looked at me saying…”Finally!”
I gave her an embarrassed look and innocently asked “Finally what? ” Hoping she misunderstood me.
She smartly looked at me and said “I know about you and Dad”. I asked how she figured out we were gay and she told me that it was strange that two men would be living together for so long.
I felt a jolt of relief that the cat was out of the bag and it was no big deal to this 8 year old girl. If only more adults could be as understanding and honest.
Sometimes letting our guard down and revealing our true selves can set us free and help bring us closer to others. Honesty Rules.